Cleaned...
Dressed...
Why did Mrs. Snapper, my own mother, name me 'Hog'? Wouldn't Tulip have sounded better? I bet people would say nice things about Tulip Snapper. Or Daisy? Daisy Snapper, sounds exotic yet lovable. I have lovely pink skin, maybe Pinky? Or maybe something biblical like Abraham-Abraham Snapper, Attorney-At-Law-I could have had a great reputation not just as a delicious piece of meat, but as a fine litigator and delightful cocktail-party bon vivant. I would quote Wilde when people spoke badly of me-'Well', I would say, 'there is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about!' And we would all laugh and drink our classic Manhattans-rye, sweet vermouth, and an orange peel, twisted to release the essence of orange oil. Oh, the fun we'd have. But no, I am not Abraham Snapper, nor Tulip Snapper, I am Hog Snapper, the tastiest of all the Snappers. And sadly, even if I am more delicious than my more popular siblings Yellow Tail and Mangrove, no one ever talks about me. Ever.
Marinated...
...and cooked.