Sunday, January 13, 2008

The Most Excellent Order of the British Empire...of Barbecue

While everyone promotes the taco experience in Homestead, due to the influx of Mexican immigrants, I instead head for an even older tradition down south, which is barbecue. And for that, no one beats the current royalty of the rib, Sir Woody. Sir Woody rolls his enormous custom-built smoker/griller into the empty lot on SW 344th St every Friday and Saturday, and if you think you smell ribs while you're shopping at 'Robert Is Here' three long blocks away, it is coming from Sir Woody's. I stepped into his trailer, and it was spotless. Gleaming, almost. Award plaque hanging on the wall from 2002, evidence of longevity. My only advice to you, while you're figuring out what to order, is everything. Not complicated. Chicken legs-skin crisped like the best duck you've ever had, dark meat pink, moist, and smoky. Ribs smoked, crisped to order, and served crackling. I was lucky enough to snare an entire barbecued pork loin that Sir Woody had just brought to peak perfection, crispy on the outside and juicy and tender on the inside. Driving away with our food, the car became so irresistibly fragrant with smoke and pig aromas that my touring companion and I were compelled to finally pull over and devour most of it squatting in the dirt under a tree by the side of the road. As she opened our Jarritos Limon (Lemon Sodas) with the lug wrench (we had forgotten an opener), we busted up the chicken and ribs, too. As the homemade BBQ sauce made its way down our chins (we had forgotten napkins, too, but thank you gas station toilet paper!), the portions we were saving for our significant others back in Miami got smaller and smaller. I guess they'll have to make their own trip down south. Anyway, Sir Woody commands you.
Sir Woody...SW 344th St (Palm Dr.) near Krome Ave. Friday and Saturday Cash Only

It takes a real woman to open a soda bottle with a lug wrench, bitches!

Had to smell this one again.